Narrative Therapy
You are more than the story you've been told about yourself.
Sometimes the way we see ourselves can be shaped by difficult experiences, other people's expectations, or what we've been told about who we are.
Maybe you've started to think of yourself as anxious, difficult, not good enough, too sensitive, or someone who always messes things up.
Narrative Therapy offers a different way of looking at these stories. Instead of seeing a problem as something that defines you, we can explore the relationship between you and the problem, understand where these ideas came from, and make space for other parts of your story.
At Sholinder Counselling Collective, we use Narrative Therapy to help adolescents and young adults explore how their experiences have shaped the way they see themselves, their relationships, and their possibilities. We can look at the stories that feel most powerful, while also noticing the experiences, values, strengths, and relationships that may have been overlooked.
What Is Narrative Therapy?
Narrative Therapy is based on the idea that people make meaning of their lives through the stories they develop about themselves and their experiences.
These stories can be shaped by family, culture, relationships, communities, and the experiences we have.
Sometimes, a difficult experience can become a very big part of the story we tell about ourselves.
For example:
“I failed that class, so I'm not smart.”
or
“My friendships keep falling apart, so something must be wrong with me.”
Narrative Therapy doesn't ask you to ignore difficult experiences or pretend that everything is fine. Instead, we can slow down and look at the bigger story.
What happened? Where did this belief about yourself come from? Has it always been true? Are there experiences that don't quite fit the story?
This can create space for a more complete and meaningful understanding of who you are.
How Can Narrative Therapy Help?
Narrative Therapy can help you look at your experiences from a different perspective and separate who you are from the problems you're experiencing.
Together, we might work on:
Separating you from the problem — instead of seeing anxiety, anger, self-doubt, or another difficulty as part of who you are, we can explore how that problem is affecting your life.
Understanding your story — looking at the experiences and messages that have influenced how you see yourself.
Finding the parts that don't fit — noticing moments when you responded differently, showed strength, or experienced something that challenges the problem's story about you.
Identifying what matters to you — exploring your values, hopes, relationships, and the things that are important to you.
Creating new possibilities — developing a fuller story about yourself that includes more than your struggles.
The goal isn't to replace a “negative story” with a forced positive one. It's about creating a more complete story—one that makes room for your experiences, strengths, values, and hopes.
What Can Narrative Therapy Help With?
Narrative Therapy may be incorporated into counselling when you're experiencing:
Anxiety and worry
Low self-esteem or self-confidence
Identity questions and self-discovery
Difficult life transitions
Relationship and family challenges
Experiences of feeling misunderstood or judged
The effects of difficult or traumatic experiences
Feelings of shame, self-blame, or not being “good enough”
Narrative approaches have been used with children, adolescents, adults, couples, and families across a range of concerns. Research involving children and adolescents is promising, but the evidence base for Narrative Therapy is still developing and is not as extensive as the research base for approaches such as CBT.
For this reason, Narrative Therapy is often best understood as one approach that can be adapted and combined with other therapeutic strategies depending on the person and their goals.
What Does Narrative Therapy Look Like?
Narrative Therapy is still counselling—you don't need to write a novel or tell your life story from beginning to end.
Sessions may involve talking about experiences, relationships, and the ways you understand yourself. We might also use questions and conversations to explore your story in more detail.
For example, we might explore:
When a problem first started affecting your life
What the problem has been trying to convince you about yourself
Times when you've responded differently than the problem expected
People who have supported or influenced you
What your actions say about what matters to you
The kind of person you want to be moving forward
Sometimes we might give a problem a name to create some distance from it.
Instead of:
“I'm an anxious person.”
we might explore:
“What has anxiety been asking you to do?”
That small shift can create a different conversation.
What I Like About Narrative Therapy
One of the things we appreciate most about Narrative Therapy is that it doesn't reduce people to their problems.
Young people are often given labels—by themselves, by other people, or by systems around them. Sometimes those labels can start to feel like the whole story.
I like that Narrative Therapy gives us an opportunity to slow down and look more closely.
There is usually more to someone's story than the problem that brought them to counselling.
We can make space for the difficult parts while also looking for the values, relationships, strengths, choices, and experiences that tell us something important about who you are.
Is Narrative Therapy Right for Me?
Narrative Therapy may be a good fit if you've ever felt defined by a problem, misunderstood by other people, or stuck with a version of yourself that doesn't quite feel right.
It can also be a helpful approach if you're exploring questions about identity, relationships, values, or the kind of person you want to become.
You don't need to know what your “story” is before coming to counselling. We'll explore it together.
Curious about Narrative Therapy?
If you're wondering whether Narrative Therapy might be a good fit, you're welcome to book a free 15-minute consultation. We can talk about what you're looking for and see whether our approach feels right for you.